does it make sense
to lack the desire to have people understand you,
but be disappointed when you are misunderstood?
to enjoy making things,
but not want to be a "creator"?
i realize that my lack of desire for recognition from others/money/material possessions
are probably the reason i'm not "making the most" of my skills
and it makes me come across as unambitious blah fucking blah
is ambition really that necessary?
i know that when "people" become involved, it usually stops being about the "thing",
and i end up wanting to stay far far away from whatever i once enjoyed.
at the end of the day, i just don't want "what i do" or "what i can do" to become my identity.
maybe i just want the few things that make me happy in this world to stay uncorrupted?
to me, at least.
